November 16, 2015 - A special speaker was invited to the Mariposa County November 2015 Mental Health Board meeting. Along with the board members were residents of Mariposa County who had come to hear
Bob Linneman discuss his personal journey of living with being bipolar, and how he strives to overcome it on a daily basis.Mr. Linneman had stated earlier that this would not be a lecture or clinical in any way. Bob said, "The talk would be a very real look at bipolar disorder presented by one with inside knowledge."
Bob said he is a regular guy, he just wants to be called a human being and is at peace. He has to deal with this illness and that being bipolar is different in every person. Bob said he does not think being bipolar is for life, but it is hard work.
Today at 52, as he looks back, he was in his mid 20's when first diagnosed with depression. He then had a long cycle of years where doctors tried prescribing different medications to help with his depression.
He was first diagnosed with being bipolar at the age of 40, and said he was scared. At 42 he was once again diagnosed as being bipolar by a different doctor. He described himself as a walking ball of rage, which has cost him three jobs over the years.
In April of 2015 Bob decided to crawl out of the hole he felt he was in, he moved to a new place, was much happier and thought he had finally figured it out. Then on June 10, while driving East on Highway 140 in the Merced River Canyon, he suffered a seizure and ended up in the river. Luckily the drought impacted river had low water levels at the time. He woke up in a Modesto hospital and felt he was fortunate to not have any broken bones.
But a few days later he had his first manic episode. Bob said that the feeling consumes you, and to him it felt like a wave trying to get over him. He said he had to try everything to prevent it, and the episode lasted for five or six days. Now when he feels an episode beginning he uses music therapy. He advises that the manic episode wants to take control, but the key is to not let it. The second episode he experienced lasted about 15 hours and he kept himself busy by Facebook messaging and the episode eventually subsided.
Another way he helps himself is to focus, and deeply concentrate on something such as sounds outdoors to keep a manic episode away.
Bob said addiction goes with being bipolar, his addiction was with opiates. He finally admitted that he was bipolar after lying to himself for so long. “You have to be honest with yourself and have a sense of humor. Bipolar is not fatal, but leads to things that are fatal. A manic episode that has you out of control can lead you to a drug overdose”, he said.
After researching he believes he has come up with his own formula to help himself that does not involve the use of anti-psychotics. He has suffered ten to twelve manic episodes since June, and he believes that by using his own formula the episodes have begun to level out.
His recommendation to first responders that are dealing with a person having a manic episode is to try to make a conversation and talk to them not at them. He feels the last thing you should want to do is lock that person up, and that a 5150 committal should require more than one signature.
In closing Bob said, “the worst thing you can do is lock yourself away so do not hide, do not fear, get out, accept it, tell people about it and accept your life."
Life can still be good.
Mariposa County offers Emergency 24-hour Crisis Response, call: 209-966-7000 or 800-549-6741 any time 24 hours a day, seven days a week and tell the receptionist that you have a “crisis.”
